Grey's Anatomy

Just finished the 5th episode of Grey's Anatomy. It got me thinking. I'm not sure who was talking: the 3 beers, the lipovitan xl, the anxiety over a half-finished paper due later at 7:00am, or just plainly, my over-analytical brain. The topic was about growing up, being an adult, not being a kid anymore. It talked about the responsibility that comes with being an adult, or in the episode's case, being a doctor, with its accompanying perks and problems. One doctor left a surgical towel inside a patient's chest and 5 years later the patient suffered from complications. Another nicked a patient's heart during cardiac surgery with her nails. It got me thinking about the life WE led as medical interns in the hospital. The bootcamp we had to go through as medical students, with sleepless duty nights, drill-seargent-like seniors, and punishing rounds and conferences, where our insecurities and our incompetencies are paraded around in a cruel, mocking fashion. I wouldn't wish it on anybody else. Going through all that was really tough. We had to harden and desensitize ourselves, like soldiers did during training and later on in the battlefield. There was little room for error. And rightfuly so. We held lives in our hands. We were responsible for the lives (and deaths) of our patients. We had to learn and we had to do it quick and without looking back. Unfortunately, no person is infallible. No human being is perfect. And to broadcast a seemingly obvious but underlooked fact: doctors make mistakes too. Unfortunately, it sometimes becomes necessary for us to make mistakes in order to really learn and internalize a lesson which could later on save much much more lives. I am not washing my hands of this and telling other people that we shouldn't be blamed just because we're human too. Nor am I justifying mistakes made by any negligent physician. I swore to myself, as per the Hippocratic oath, that I would do everything in my power to do no harm, and to do all I can for each and every patient that I treat. I guess I can speak for most of us in the field right now, and even those just starting out (the younger they are, the more idealistic), that we regard medicine as a calling, a noble profession that we chose to go into, not because of the prestige and power that the title held, but rather as a service to men, much like a soldier being called to arms. Soldiers defend countries. Doctors save lives. Sometimes soldiers trip and die in the battlefield. Sometimes doctors trip and patients die. Soldiers are given purple crosses, gun salutes, and honorable burials. Doctors are sued for malpractice and buried in shame and debt from skyrocketing insurance fees. Now this slightly sarcastic rant may seem to most as a narrow-minded and extremely biased view about doctors. However, I can honestly say, I'm talking NOT as a physician, but as someone who has seen the inner workings of a medical bootcamp. Believe me, It isn't a very pretty sight. And to go through all of that, emerge from 5 years of limbo, and then see an impoverished county's health system in shambles and offering little chance for a rewarding life of service? It's no wonder our doctors are looking to other countries. I won't even touch on the long-drawn-out issue about doctors taking up nursing... It's old, it's sad, but it's real, and I can't blame them. A life of service, saving lives, and making other people happy, is best served by someone who is ALSO happy and fulfilled. One of my personal, and entirely natural highs is seeing a patient you took care of thanking you and telling you how much they appreciate everything you've done. Salamat po doc! As cliche as it may seem, it really gets me through the sleepless nights, the hellish duties, and the inhumane working hours. To my non-physician friends, try to cut your doctors some slack and give them a pat in the back once in a while. It helps immensely. To my colleagues, try to remember why you wanted to be a doctor in the first place. If you thought being a doctor was going to make you rich (as most people would still assume), think again! I laugh AT you and not with you. Plus, I would strongly suggest career counseling coupled with a sincere psychiatric consult. If that doesn't work, try shock-therapy with a pre-recorded voice message loudly repeating the words "What the heck were you thinking??" I jest you not. Those fresh out of medical school with their newly-acquired licenses (mainit-init pa galing sa PRC) know all too well what I'm talking about. Fact: the average newly-graduated physician earns less per hour than a starting customer service (call center) agent. Again, I kid you not. So folks, the major lesson here is... watch Grey's Anatomy! (Huh?!) It's fun, interesting, and it leaves a good reflective feeling after every episode (so far). Plus, it also helps that the lead roles are hot chicks (Ellen Pompeo and Katherine Heigl)! O girls, para naman hindi chauvinistic... andun din si Patrick Dempsey, ok? Ok. Hehe. To end on a less trivial, more relevant, and hopefully more hopeful (pun intended) note, I quote Paracelsus on his supplement to the Hippocratic oath:

"This I swear: To accomplish my system of medicine, not to waver in its defense as long as God grants me the office and to oppose all erroneous medicines and doctrines; to love the sick like my own body; not to trust my eyes, and not to prescribe medicine without understanding; not to accept a fee unless it has been earned."